superfan to the rescue

sometimes in this thing i'm doing that i pretend is my career, i feel a little futile. i wonder what effect i'm having on people, if any. i worry that i'm wasting time. and then, while i'm doing all that worrying, and setting up my little machines on a stage 700+ miles from home that will help me play my songs for people...while i'm busy busy busy thinking about the task ahead...there's someone sitting in the audience who believes in it. and he believes in it so much that he gets on a plane and shows up at these far away gigs to show how much he believes in it. and suddenly, the lonely drive and the hours and money spent getting to the remote location to play for all new people seems somehow worth it simply because someone who has heard all the songs before bothered to take the time to follow me there, to show up, to be--almost impossibly--a familiar landmark in unchartered territory.

thank you, my friend, for showing up last night. and for the afternoon tea today. these are complicated and expensive gestures you make, but rest assured, they have made me feel like a rock star. hope you made it home OK.

***********************

i wrote a new song on the drive. i sang it a capella to Raj and the crowd last night. it wasn't quite ready for Prime Time, but maybe with a piano part and some drippy reverb it will be. of course, it's a traveling song and has little to do with organized religion.

"maryanne"

o maryanne

let's ride on through the weather

we'll make a stand

we'll press our hands together

and you will say

now let us pray

and so like lovers

to our Virgin Mother

o maryanne

you might have heard

i stopped believing

in the Word

but the repeating

has left a trace

and so i hail Mary

so full of grace

o maryanne

will you help me find her?

you sing the prayer

that serves as our reminder

i'll steer the wheel

in the right direction

and maybe then

she'll offer us protection

o maryanne

do you think she'll hear us?

with satellites

clouding her receivers

and all the voices

flown to outer space

the foolish hopes

of the human race

o maryanne

i am a liar

i let my mind

be ruled by my desires

so Mother Mary

send me your grace

so that the past

can be erased

so Mother Mary

send me your grace

so that the past

can be erased.